BT HANDBOOK

Make Everyone Happy And Take The Family Reunion On Location

These days, most families are scattered all over the country, if not the world--giving more reason to get together but making it harder than ever to do so.

In 2001, senior editor Brad Tuttle's family reunited in Playa del Carmen, Mexico (Cara Ranft)

Kris Zahrobsky, a 25-year-old firefighter from the Chicago suburb of Berwyn, Ill., is a member of the Feelys, a family based mostly in the Midwest that for generations has tried to keep in touch and get together every other year or so. When Kris was growing up, the reunions were simple affairs, maybe in someone's backyard or at a state park. There wasn't a whole lot to do besides catch up, eat, and pose for pictures. "It was great to see all the relatives," says Kris, "but I remember being bored out of my mind."

For the 2005 reunion, Kris proposed a different kind of get-together--a weekend in the Wisconsin Dells, a destination that overflows with family resorts and water parks. "The Dells was my first choice," says Kris. "In the same building, the kids can go to the water park while the parents sit and relax." The Feelys decided to base the reunion at the Kalahari Resort, which has indoor and outdoor water parks, a banquet hall that can host a big family dinner, and all sorts of rooms and suites. Last fall, Kris even set up a website to post family news and a reunion itinerary, including times for group boat tours, casual gatherings in a hospitality room, and a mass on Sunday morning. The Feelys are expecting this summer's gathering to be the best turnout in years: around 200 people from 18 states, with some members of the extended family who haven't attended a reunion since the 1970s.

If you expect people to devote vacation time and endure hours of travel, the least you can do is make the reunion fun. Rather than the traditional backyard barbecue or potluck in someone's crowded living room, more and more families are going on cruises, renting a few beach houses, or heading to all-inclusive resorts.

Planning a big reunion is difficult enough. Add in coordinating a vacation that jibes with everyone's budget, schedule, and desires, and the job becomes nearly impossible. Age-old rivalries and differences don't help either. "You find out how dysfunctional your family is when planning a reunion," says Stacey Hopkins of Atlanta, Ga., whose family reunion of 150 to 200 people takes place every other year, usually somewhere in the eastern U.S. "Our family has a lot of alpha females, and it's not pretty when people don't agree. The experience can be traumatic."

From the planning stages to exchanging pictures after the trip's over, everyone involved should try to be flexible and keep things pleasant. "Don't talk about religion, politics, and child rearing," says Laurence Basirico, author of The Family Reunion Survival Guide. "Not if you expect everybody to have a good time, anyway."

There are many ways to make the experience as painless--and as fun--as possible, and we've done some of the homework for you. The consensus is that you should begin planning a reunion at least a year in advance, to allow time for deciding where to go and when, to give everyone ample warning for taking off work, and to make sure rooms will be available. If you've got a reasonably big group--over 20, say--lodging reservations should be made eight or more months ahead. Memorial Day to Labor Day is prime family reunion season because kids are out of school. The Christmas break is also popular, but prices are sky-high and many people have traditions they like to keep at home, as well as commitments to the other side of the family.

It's usually clear who'll be the reunion ringleaders--the same crew of matriarchs (and sometimes patriarchs) who host Thanksgiving dinners and send cards to everyone on their birthdays. "Somebody's gotta take charge, but no one should do it alone," says Basirico. "When things get going, have a travel agent serve as a neutral third party." People won't be offended when an agent says there's a deadline for deposits (and it's handy to have an outsider to blame should things go wrong).

After a few casual conversations indicate that there's a fair amount of interest, one of the ringleaders should send out a group e-mail. To keep the conversation from literally going all over the map, offer roughly three possibilities. List a few pros and cons for each, as well as ballpark costs. To avoid any confusion, specify up front who will have to pay for what. Some people will want to go camping while others will lean toward five-star resorts, so compromise is essential. Organizers of the Feely reunion in Wisconsin Dells knew that not everyone wanted to pay over $100 a night at the Kalahari Resort, so they provided booking details for a nearby campground.

Have each family pick a leader to voice its concerns and, if necessary, put the decision on where to go to a vote. Don't get hung up if someone doesn't want to go or cancels at the last minute. Carry on with the people who want to be there.

Note:This story was accurate when it was published. Please be sure to confirm all rates and details directly with the companies in question before planning your trip.
 
Follow Us!

Booking Tool

Check Current Prices

  1. Hotels
  2. Flights
  3. Cars
  4. Cruises

Choose Sites

Choose Sites

Choose Sites

Choose Sites

Travel Tips

Tagged
Family Travel
381255

When my husband and I would stay in a hotel with our two-year-old, a full night's sleep was out of the question. The minute our son opened his eyes (at 2,3,or 4 a.m.), he woke us, thinking it was time to play. We now pack a pop-up tent and set it up in a corner of the hotel room with books, a blanket, and a few small stuffed animals. The tent folds down to a 14-inch circle and weighs about a pound. It works great! My son has his own "room" to sleep in when we vacation, and we all get to sleep through the night!

— Geri Kronyak
Tagged
Hotels
439361

If you can't sleep due to the heat in your non-air-conditioned hotel room, take a cold bottle of water and place it on your pillow, in the crook of your neck. It will cool your whole body down.

— Tony van Hasselt
Tagged
Packing
405280

When I travel with friends, we decide ahead of time who's going to bring what. If we're sharing a suite or have adjoining rooms, we don't need multiple hair dryers and umpteen bottles of shampoo. With the weight limits on baggage, we'll need the extra space in our suitcases for souvenirs!

— Haley Christensen
Tagged
Packing
354296

I used to lug around a clothes steamer and adapter to stay wrinkle-free while on the road, but I've since opted for something more low-tech. I now travel with a Platypus collapsible bottle and a spray bottle head. After checking into my hotel, I immediately hang my clothes and give them a spritz with water from the spray bottle. After several hours, the wrinkles fall out, and the clothing is dry and ready to wear.

— Dr. Cornelia Cho
Tagged
Planning
360263

My friends and I contribute to a kitty and use that money to pay for group expenses such as taxis and meals. It saves us from having to figure out each person's share at every stop. At the end of the trip, we split what remains.

— Carol Moran
Tagged
Planning
361254

If you're divorced and plan to travel out of the country with your children, check the legal requirements in advance. When I tried to take my kids to Cancun, I learned too late that Mexico requires a notarized letter of consent signed by both parents for minors traveling alone or with one parent or guardian. If the parents are divorced, a copy of the parental custody agreement is allowed instead. The airlines enforce this rule before you get on the plane.

— Marge Stratton
Tagged
Air Travel
371276

Finding healthy breakfast alternatives at an airport can prove difficult. I always travel with an insulated travel mug. Before leaving home I fill it with a high-protein cereal and then request low-fat milk on the flight.

— Randy Hartselle
Tagged
Solo Travel
343263

When I travel to a new city, I check with the local running club to see if there are any events planned during my stay. The entry fee is usually donated to a charity, and I get great exercise, meet locals, and tour a part of the city I may not have known about.

— Kelly Christensen
Tagged
Planning
529593

While traveling, I love to send postcards to friends--and also to myself. I get the best photo postcard of the place I visited and write down what I did there as a reminder. When I get home, I tape them in my travel journals so I can flip back and forth between the photo and the reverie.

— Kimberly Morgan
Tagged
Technology
382299

To find the perfect destination with airfare that meets your budget, try Travelocity's Dream Maps travel tool (travelocity.com). Select a maximum fare and a type of destination (city, national park, etc.) and the Web site will display a variety of trips matching that description.

— Matt Vance
Tagged
Technology
551577

Making international calls back to the States can be confusing if you're using a calling card and you're dialing a number by its catchphrase, such as CALL ATT. Obviously, many countries don't have the English alphabet on the telephone keypad. My solution? I create my own small keypads on a computer, print them out, and attach them inside my wallet, to my passport, and to my calling cards.

— Peter Morris
Tagged
Technology
419282

I used a well-known travel site to price tickets for a trip to Las Vegas. The flight I wanted was available, but I decided to wait to see if prices would come down. That flight stopped being listed after a week, and the next best flight kept getting more expensive. About five weeks later, I checked prices from a different PC. Whaddya know? The original flight was available, for $50 less than that next-best flight. That same evening I checked again from my PC. The flight I wanted was not available,so I deleted the cookies for the site and tried again. Voilà! The flight I wanted at the price I wanted. Moral of the story: Clean up your cookies—it could save you money!

— Kelly Malasics
Tagged
Car Rentals
365256

We rented a car last summer to tour northern Italy. Initially, we contacted Europcar (europcar.com) and got a quote of more than $500. We then clicked on a rental-car link from Best Fares (bestfares.com) and received an offer that knocked off about $50. When we mentioned to Europcar that we'd seen lower offers on the Web, they told us that if we sent them the URL and they could verify the offer, they'd match it. We eventually found a car that was an additional $100 cheaper from a British company. Europcar-which offered better service for our itinerary-accepted that lower price, saving us $150.

— Marcia Meyer
Tagged
Packing
360255

I always pack a Petzl Tikka Plus headlamp. It's small, weighs next to nothing, and is perfect for reading in bed at night without disturbing my husband. They're sold online and at outdoor-gear stores for about $33.

— Linda Smejkal
Tagged
Cruises
456596

Most cruise lines offer certain drinks for free--juice, lemonade, iced tea, coffee, milk, tea-but you'll have to pay for soda. If you're a caffeine addict, pack a bottle or two. Unlike on a plane, you won't have to worry about paying for the added weight.

— Martha and Ken Wiseman
Tagged
Air Travel
368261

Tired of catching colds while traveling? Take along a travel-size package of Clorox wipes. Disinfect the tray table and armrests on the airplane, and the telephone and TV remote in your hotel room.

— Sherill Hacker
Tagged
Cruises
385334

If you even manage to get a cell signal while at sea, your roaming charges will be outrageous. To communicate with your cabinmates, leave Post-it Notes on your door detailing where you'll be throughout the day.

— Martha and Ken Wiseman
Tagged
Loyalty Programs
373256

After I was unable to locate any awards seats online for a wide selection of days and routes, I called the airline. An agent told me that the airline's Web site isn't allowed to book awards seats for its partner airlines, but agents can. Within minutes, I had enough options that I found it difficult to make a decision.

— Carol Muth
Tagged
Air Travel
362243

If you've accumulated more souvenirs on your trip than you can carry, drive your rental car up to curbside check-in, then return the vehicle and come back on the shuttle bus with only your carry-on. This only works if there's no check-in line, but can save dragging your luggage onto the shuttle bus, across parking lots, etc.

— Robyn Volkening
Tagged
Air Travel
375262

Ask your flight attendants for dining, lodging, shopping, and sightseeing advice. Most crews have up to the minute information gleaned from layovers, which they're more than happy to share with passengers. You can count on flight attendants to seek out budget treasures. I know—I've been married to one for more than 21 years!

— Fred Manget
Tagged
Technology
428291

Quotetravelinsurance.com gives you comparable details on more than one hundred travel-insurance plans, enabling you to make the best buy. It relies on ratings from insurance industry overseers such as A.M. Best and state insurance commissioners before allowing an insurance company into its extensive lineup.

— Marc Oppy
Tagged
Hotels
424359

Finding the bathroom in the middle of the night in a strange hotel room or cruise-ship cabin can be a challenge. Leaving the bathroom light on seems wasteful and makes the room too bright for sleeping. My husband and I used to travel with a night-light, but we couldn't always find a convenient place to plug it in. We've recently discovered a better solution: plastic light sticks. They come in several glow-in-the- dark colors and are activated by bending the tube into a circle and connecting the ends. Each evening, we hook one of the loops over the bathroom-door handle, where it provides a gentle glow through the night.

— Carol Attar
Tagged
Packing
389299

My husband packs Q-tips in a plastic cassette case. It's small and snaps shut, keeping the cotton swabs clean and dry.

— Nancy Bastian
Tagged
Packing
477594

When traveling in the developing world, I always bring several packets of stickers to give to children. They're wonderful icebreakers.

— Linda Vogel
Tagged
Packing
361279

Pack a glue stick for journaling. Rather than bringing home an envelope full of ticket stubs and mementos, you can glue them into your journal as you're traveling. You'll have a better chance of remembering what the ticket was for if you label it right away.

— Jon Chun
Tagged
Shopping
385259

When buying bottled water, look at the bottle cap to see if the seal is still intact. While visiting the Acropolis on a very hot day this summer, I caught a young boy refilling empty water bottles from a tap and recapping them. He was then selling the bottles to thirsty tourists.

— Alice Atkinson
Tagged
Loyalty Programs
431654

Pay close attention to those newsletters enclosed in your frequent-flier statements. They usually contain special offers and promotions that can earn you double or triple miles if you stay at a certain hotel or eat at a certain restaurant.

— Kim Borisenko
Tagged
Planning
373262

We've traveled to both Mexico and China in the last year and had the same experience in both countries: When we tried to exchange dollars to local currency, the banks wouldn't take bills with graffiti on them--telephone numbers, names, doodles, anything. Nor would they accept any bills that were torn or damaged. (We noticed a group from France having the same problem with their euros.) So before you leave home, make sure that any money you plan on exchanging is absolutely crisp and clean--or better yet, ask your bank specifically for brand-new bills.

— John Rybczyk
Tagged
Safety
436324

A padlocked zipper tells thieves there's something in your bag worth stealing, but a key ring is much less obvious. Just use it to latch together the zippers. Best of all, you'll never have to worry about forgetting your combination.

— France Freeman
Tagged
Packing
352265

Avoid spills in your Dopp kit. Cut up plastic grocery bags into little squares and place them under the tops of toiletries to prevent leaks. Discard the squares upon arrival, but bring extras for the trip back.

— Roland Zuniga

Custom Search

Select the details relevant to your trip to see a list of articles that match your needs — it's the best way to get ideas!
SELECT YOUR DESTINATION
SELECT YOUR ACTIVITIES