Stealing Buddha's Dinner

March 8, 2007
070312_buddha
In her new memoir, Bich Minh Nguyen writes about coming of age in Grand Rapids, Mich., where she struggled to fit in and longed for American fast food.

Anh and I hung out with the others kids in the basement, playing Atari and ping-pong and watching TV. The commercials held our interest as much as any show, for they let us know what we should be eating, playing, and wearing. They let us know how we should be. After a commercial for Lite-Brite a girl with shiny pink barrettes might triumph, "My ma and ba me bought that." Another kid would boast about going to McDonald's three times in one week.

Almost all these kids were way ahead of me and Anh. Their parents were anxious for them to fit into Grand Rapids and found the three quickest avenues: food, money, and names. Food meant American burgers and fries. Money meant Jordache jeans and Izod shirts. Names meant a whole new self. Overnight, Thanh's children, Truoc and Doan, became Tiffany and David, and other families followed. Huong to Heather, Quoc to Kevin, Lien to Lynette. Most of the kids chose their own names and I listened while they debated the merits of Jennifer versus Michelle, Stephanie versus Crystal. They created two lives for themselves: the American one and the Vietnamese one--Oriental as we all said back then. Out in the world they were Tiffany and David; at home they were Truoc and Doan. The mothers cooked two meals--pho and sautés for the elders, Campbell's soup and Chef Boyardee for the kids.

Rosa would have none of it. She hadn't changed her own name when she married, after all, and had named my brother Vinh--not some white name, she scoffed. She told Anh and me that we needed to be proud of who we were. Still, my sister tried out Ann for a little while, until laziness prevailed and she went back to Anh. It was an easy name anyway, and caused her little stress. Not like my name: Bich. In Vietnamese it meant jade, which was all well and fine in Vietnam but meant nothing in Michigan. It was pronounced with an accent tilting up, the tone leading almost toward a question, with a silent h. Bic! I hated the sound--too harsh, too hard, and the c so slight that it evaporated in the air. I preferred to hear it as Bit. The sound seemed tidier, quieter. So that's what I made my name over to be, and it was fine until my classmates learned to read and swear. By second grade I was being regularly informed that I was a bitch. I started fantasizing then about being Beth, or maybe Vanessa or Polly. I longed to be Jenny Adams with the perfect simple name to match her perfect honeyed curls. But I knew I could never make it stick. Who would listen to me? Who would allow me to change? Not Rosa, nor anyone at school. I could not tell my stepmother, my father, my sister--I could tell no one--what I suffered each day during roll call. The shame layered upon embarrassment equaled silence. I felt I could judge the nature and compassion of teachers, especially substitutes, by the way they read my name. The good ones hesitated and gently spelled it, avoiding a phonetic pronounciation. The evil ones simply called out, Bitch? Bitch Nu-guy-in?

So I listened carefully, enviously, while the kids in Thanh's basement transformed themselves into true Americans. Most of their parents had factory jobs, too, but that didn't stop them from buying nice clothes and tennis shoes and toys, whatever it took to assimilate. Rosa wouldn't have that either. She believed in pinching pennies, as she put it, and my longing for a Jenny Adams wardrobe was useless against her rules about clothes. Rosa favored reds and burgundies, claiming they were best for our skin types, and she forbade me and Anh from wearing yellow. "Never, never, never," she said. "Girls with your skin color look sallow in yellow." When we shopped we hit the discount stores. Her favorite was Burlington Coat Factory, which in spite of its name mostly sold clothes. They were piled in giant bins or stuffed tight into circular hanging displays. On principle alone Rosa purchased only what was on sale, her eyes lighting up at the word clearance. When I went to school in blue corduroys and a pink sweater stitched with a picture of a stallion rearing up, I avoided sitting next to Jenny Adams with her flowered dresses and polished Mary Janes.

While the other girls in Thanh's basement learned to dress like Jenny, I found comfort in the girl whose parents were as stubborn as mine: Loan, who remained Loan, which carried a lovely double syllabic. Lo-an. We went to the same school during first and second grade, and became the best of friends. Bitch and Loan, some of the kids said on the playground. Hey bitch, can you loan me some money?

At home, I kept opening the refrigerator and cupboards wishing for American foods to magically appear. I wanted what the other kids had: Bundt cakes and casseroles, Chee-tos and Doritos. My secret dream was to bite off just the tip of every slice of pizza in the two-for-one deal we got at Little Caesar's. The more American foods I ate, the more my desires multiplied, outpacing any interest in Vietnamese food. I had memorized the menu at Dairy Cone, the sugary options in the cereal aisle at Meijer's, and every inch of the candy display at Gas City: the rows of gum, the rows with chocolate, the rows without chocolate. I knew the spartan packs of Juicy Fruit as well as the fat pillows of Bubble Yum, Bubbalicious, Hubba Bubba, Chewels, Tidal Wave, the shreds of Big League Chew, and the gum shaped into hot dogs and hamburgers...I dreamed of Little Debbie, Dolly Madison, Swiss Miss, all the bakeries presided over by prim and proper girls.

Reprinted by arrangement with Viking, a member of Penguin Group (USA) Inc., from Stealing Buddha's Dinner by Bich Minh Nguyen. Copyright (c) 2007 by Bich Minh Nguyen.

Plan Your Next Getaway
Keep reading

Trip Coach: March 6, 2007

Budget Travel editors: Welcome to this week's Trip Coach. Let's get to your questions! _______________________ Newbury Park, CA: My cousin and I are turning fifty this year; October 26 & 28, respectively. We decided to go on a trip together with our husbands to celebrate. We were planning Maui until a trip to the Dominican Republic was suggested for the same cost but including an all inclusive resort . However, how chancy is late October for hurricaines? Is this mid-season, end of the season or just after. Would you play it safe and go to Maui where we've already been or check out the Dominican or wait for a better time of year? Budget Travel editors: If you've already been to Maui, then why not try out some place new? The Dominican Republic has long been a hugely popular destination thanks to its crystal-clear waters and sandy beaches, but most importantly it's still one of the best values in the Caribbean. As you're keen to point out, an all-inclusive vacation in the DR can often cost less than the cost of flights alone somewhere else. But before you consider an all-inclusive property, know what you're getting into: The food is usually not that great and you'll be in a walled-off resort complex most of the time, which can get a bit claustrophobic. Still, it's an unbeatable value. As for hurricane season, there's nothing wrong with planning a trip at its tail end (hurricane season lasts from June 1 to November 30) but you should consider buying travel insurance just in case a storm comes your way. Every policy is a little different so compare policies at websites like InsureMyTrip.com and QuoteTravelInsurance.com. Also, when large-scale catastrophes hit, including hurricanes or even terrorist attacks, most airlines and hotels allow customers to change or cancel their plans without penalty--something to keep in mind if you don't feel like spending the extra cash. _______________________ Colorado Springs, CO: My husband and I would like to take a week-long family vacation this year with our two children (ages 1 and 3) to Yellowstone National Park. We plan on driving, so activities along the way would be wonderful to keep the kids interested. I read that it's best to visit Yellowstone early or late in the season (May/early June or September/October) to avoid crowds, but we haven't decided which we'd prefer. Can you give us advice about timing, places to visit and places to stay? Thanks! Susie Budget Travel editors: Susie, Thanks for emailing. You'll love Yosemite. It's one of America's most breathtaking sights. You'll never forget it. The advantage of visiting in May and June--besides thinner crowds--is that the spring snows will have melted, engorging the waterfalls for the most spectacular displays. (If the moon is full and the sky is clear, the moon will cast enough light on the waterfalls that you'll see a "moonbow". If the moon isn't full but the sky is still clear, you'll have an unobstructed view of an even prettier nighttime sky than you've seen outside of Colorado Springs, because of nearly zero light pollution.) One disadvantage of traveling in May and June is that the snows may not have fully melted, and you may be unable to see some of the high-altitude sights, such as the gorgeous carpet of flowers in Tuolumne Meadows, which are a 40-minute detour off of route 120, the main drag through the park. If you're planning to camp in the park, book your place as soon as possible through the park service (nps.gov). Spots fill up quickly. If you're planning to stay at an affordable motel, expect to be staying outside the park--because the lodgings inside the park are expensive. And if you stay outside the park, plan to be driving forty-to-sixty minute, one-way stretches from your motel to the most well-known sections of the parks. The roads through the park have speed limits that can be as low as 30 miles per hour for long stretches of time, especially given the many switchbacks, S-bends, and motor-homes. ("Don't hit that baby bear!") Once you're there, consider splurging on dinner at the Wawona Lodge. (Call ahead for reservations.) Everything in the park is expensive--except for the Village Store supply shop in Yosemite Village--because all the shops are run by a monopoly business. Having tried a bunch of the restaurants in the park last spring, we can recommend the restaurant at the Wawona Hotel as the most worth a splurge (about $15 per person for a two-course dinner). They're a family-friendly enterprise. yosemitepark.com/Accommodations_WawonaHotel.aspx. You've got an intimidating 19-hour drive ahead of you. Perhaps longer with diaper-changing duty. Given the long stretches of empty highway ahead of you, plan out your drive in advance! Even if you're not a member of AAA, you can use their online site to plan your trip. Here's how it works: Visit AAA's main website, click on the TripTik link, and then enter your zip code and itinerary. The site will fetch turn-by-turn driving directions, detour suggestions, and other travel information. Next, look at the top left-hand corner of the screen and click on the button that says Show. From the drop-down menu that appears, select Gas. Now you'll see gas stations along your route when you scan your online map displaying turn-by-turn directions. Click on the gas stations that will make the most convenient pit stops. The website will add those gas stations to your printable map. If you wave your cursor over any gas station icon on the map, the recent per-gallon price for gas at that station will appear. (AAA uses daily data from OPIS, a service that collects and provides fuel price data.) Most of all, have fun! _______________________ Tinley Park, IL: After seeing a special on TV regarding train travel, we¿re planning to take a train trip sometime next summer. Any advice? Budget Travel editors: Thanks for writing us. Sounds like you're planning a fun and memorable trip for your family. To get some ideas on train travel, I recommend you read through the transcript of our live chat last week with train expert Fred Frailey. You can do so clicking here. Frailey has taken every scenic train route in the U.S., and his picks for the top three routes are: 1. California Zephyr, westbound from Denver to Oakland (the train originates in Chicago, but the scenery starts leaving Denver). Unquestionably the best of the bunch. 2. Coast Starlight, between Oakland and LA (the train runs Seattle to LA and the line through Oregon is scenic but no competition for the hour between Surf and Goleta CA when there is nothing but the Pacific Coast and the Coast Starlight). 3. Empire Builder either way between Chicago and Seattle. The gem is the three hours through the Rockies between Libby and Whitefish, Mont. However, those routes are expensive. Yet you can do a small portion of these routes, and save money. Or you could drive to Amtrak's AutoTrain, which departs from about forty-minutes south of Washington, D.C., and ride with your family down to near Orlando, Fla. Frailey says this is a scenic route, and the AutoTrain is set-up to be one of the most kid-friendly of the Amtrak operations. As he says, "The national parks are ill served by Amtrak." Good luck! _______________________ Las Vegas, NV: Do you know of any resourses, preferably on-line, that will give you all non-stop routes out of a specific airport? My husband and i just went to London for one week, only because I had heard Virgin Atlantic had a non-stop flight and the fare was fantastic! (600 each, non-stop). We are travelers that would go some where just because we can get there non-stop, for a long list of obvious reasons. Any suggestions? Thanks! Ann Budget Travel editors: Ann, I hope my answer to your separate question from days ago about Danny Meyer and wine tips was helpful. Glad you enjoyed London. I'm all in favor of paying a little extra for a nonstop flight because of my previous bad experiences with lost luggage, etc. Unfortunately, I don't know of a website that lists all the destinations that have nonstop flights from Las Vegas. However, all the major online travel sites let you limit your search so that all the "nonstop" fares pop up first. For example, if you go to your favorite online agency or meta-search site (such as Kayak.com or Travelocity.com), you can type in your departure airport, Las Vegas, your destination, and then pick "nonstop". The site will fetch nonstop fares to that place. (When you're searching, make sure you opt for "flexible dates"--meaning that you'd be willing to leave a few days before or after a certain date. Otherwise, nonstop flights that only depart four out of seven days of the week might not turn up in your search. It'll take some trial and error to find destinations. If you're up for a splurge, there's MAXjet Las Vegas-London, $1,398 (in business class). _______________________ Los Angeles, CA: My husband and I will be taking our daughters age 15 and 33 to Ghana this August. This is the 50 liberation anniversary. We want to know what is the most economical way to go and what should we do? The 15 year old is a bit nervous about shots and or mosquitos. Your suggestions are appreciated. Lori Budget Travel editors: Lori, What a gift to give your child! First, a practical matter. Single-entry visas require a $50 fee. Contact the Embassy of Ghana, 3512 International Drive, N.W., Washington, D.C. 20008 (202/686-4520, ghana-embassy.org). Plan your trip out with care. Start in Accra with tours of the National Museum, Makola Market, Kwame Memorial, and the W.E.B. DuBois Center for Pan-African Studies. Then travel to Cape Coast, with visits to the African Historical Museum and a tour of the fifteenth-century slave dungeons inside Elmina Castle. Sadly, from L.A., there is no economical way to get to Ghana. Only British Airways and Ghana International Airlines are competing via London, and fares don't often dip below $1,100 in May/June. The advantage of London is that your family may be able to get a discounted round trip ticket to London, then switch planes to a separate flight from London to Accra. You may pay less that way than by buying a single trip that includes all legs of travel. However, be wary of taking this option if it involves switching airports in London. That's too much of a hassle, given that your family will be carrying many bags for an overseas trip. Afriqiyah Airways is a Libyan airline, which is uses the capital of Libya, Tripoli, as a layover between Gatwick airport in London to Tripoli, They're cheap, and the Airbus aircraft are new. Learn more at afriqiyah.aero. Again, note that this airline departs from Gatwick, while many international flights from L.A. arrive in Heathrow. Research your options for traveling between airports--with sufficient time between flights--before you make a purchase. If you'd like to be coached in more detail on your trip, send an email to Letters@budgettravelonline.com. _______________________ Astor, FL: I'm a senior traveling by bus into Canada in July, 2007. Will be there for 3 days and returning to the USA. I see lots of information regarding air travel to/from Canada but not much pertaining to bus travel. I do not have a passport. What documentation will I need to enter Canada and return during the July, 2007 timeframe? I am thoroughly confused about this and time is running short. Thank you. Budget Travel editors: To quote from the U.S. State Department, "For Canada, you'll need either a passport or a proof of U.S. citizenship, such as a birth certificate or a naturalization certificate. Also bring a photo ID. Visas are not required." This policy applies whether you're crossing into Canada by bus, train, plane, or automobile. If you have further questions, look at the Canadian embassy website. canadianembassy.org _______________________ Lockport, LA: I'm going to Rome and Paris for a week each beganning march 28th. Can you give me info on places to eat and things to do. Alfred Budget Travel editors: Lucky you! We have lots of resources and recent articles online that can help you plan your time in Rome and Paris. For an insider take on the best places to eat, shop, and sightsee, download our free Rome Snap Guide and Paris Snap Guide. In Rome, one of the latest attractions is the Ara Pacis Museum designed by American architect Richard Meier as a new home for the ancient Altar of Peace. Our favorite walking tours are run by Context Travel's team of historians, archaeologists, and foodies. They can get you into underground tombs and other normally restricted sites. You can find more suggestions--from the best gelato to a lovely medieval church--in the article Rome Sweet Rome. As for Paris, we highlighted a flurry of new museum openings in Face-Lift: Cultural News in Paris. You can even take an interactive tour of the Musée de l'Orangerie from home! _______________________ Budget Travel editors: Thank you for joining us. Please come back next Tuesday!

Clever New Travel Products Arrive

Last week, manufacturers unveiled their latest travel gadgets and luggage at the annual Travel Goods Association show. Here's a look at a half-dozen of the most interesting new products. Store liquids safely. Flight attendant Alisa Caviness-Driscoll heard the same complaint from passengers over and over again, whether it was about shampoo, lotion, or perfume: "The top came off, and it got all over everything!" So she invented plastic-and-aluminum pump tubes that are leakproof and shatterproof. These tubes--which she's named Pitotubes--meet Transportation Security Administration rules for transporting liquids in carry-on luggage in containers that are no heavier than three ounces. The travel-sized tubes cost $10 each. To buy, call 208/853-1416 or find a list of retailers at pitotubes.com. Pack it better. Perhaps you've seen packing expert Anne McAlpin on various TV shows using a piece of cardboard as a homemade packing tool. The board splits a suitcase into horizontal halves, and clothing can be wrapped around the board to minimize wrinkles. This winter, the Anne McAlpin Packing Board hits stores, including step-by-step instructions for using the board and a packing checklist. The small version of the board is designed for bags that are 20-22 inches wide and costs $18. A larger board sells for $20. Sold by Travel Essentials (800/258-0758; travelessentials.com) and other stores. Luggage for kids. British designer Rob Law says, "We understand that adults buy products, while children make friends with them." That's why his company created Trunki, the first ride-on suitcase, for children 3 to 6 years old. His brightly colored bag is sturdy enough to support your kids while you tow it with a strap. Or when you need to be more practical, you can carry  the bag on your shoulder. The bags are being sold by Magmatic in the U.S. Each bag resembles a cartoonish-looking animal and costs $40. Preorder at trunki.net. Purify your water. Six years ago, the company Hydro-Photo invented a handheld gizmo that can purify your water using ultraviolet light. It combated Montezuma's revenge and other waterborne illnesses by destroying viruses, bacteria, and protozoa (including giardia and cryptosporidium) in seconds. Trouble was, this device--called the SteriPen--was bulky. This winter, the company produced a new version: SteriPen Traveler. It's half the size and weight of the "classic" version, standing only six inches high and weighing less than four ounces. It also has a solar charging accessory that can keep its batteries fresh in remote locations. Find SteriPen Traveler at C&C Outdoors (ccoutdoorstore.com) for $130.  Bags you can lean on. Polio survivor Etsuo Miyoshi wanted luggage that was light enough to maneuver through airports and strong enough to sit on--or even use as a walking aid. Of course, Miyoshi designed the bag he wanted, and his company, Swany, has just debuted the Swany Continental Collection Pocketbag, a 22-inch rolling bag that's strong enough to sit or lean on. Its four wheels rotate in all directions for easy handling. The price is $225. Place orders through Swany at 800/237-9269, ext. 102. Not for sale on the Web. Get a retro look. When air travel was still fun and sophisticated, Pan Am ruled the skies. You can retrieve a bit of that glamour by toting a retro-style bag embossed with the logo of the airline (which now operates just a few flights a day). For example, the Flight One bag ($49) was the first cabin bag that Pan Am provided to first-class passengers. The Presidential bag ($69) was carried by John F. Kennedy during his presidential campaign. These and other Pan Am bags are coming soon to stores. In the meantime, you can order bags from PanAmOne by calling 212/391-9130, or selected bags via eModa.com. Related links:   Best New Wheelie Bags: 2007 Test   Splurges: Impress Your Travel Companions   The BT Minute: How to Pack

Bargains Ahoy!

Every spring and fall, cruise lines move many of their ships to new climates on what they call "repositioning" cruises. They discount the rooms--charging less than $125 a day per person for interior rooms, for example--because these itineraries are generally one-way and hit passengers with the additional cost of buying one-way plane tickets home. These cruises also usually last longer than seven days, which isn't to everyone's taste, so cruise lines try to make these trips more attractive with lower prices. As a rule, passengers pay less per day for these longer cruises than for standard ones. The most typical repositioning cruise is a transatlantic one. If you've ever wanted to take a transatlantic cruise, a repositioning run is the most affordable way to do it. The transatlantic market is dominated by the ultraluxury cruise lines, such as Cunard and Oceania, which rarely offer interior rooms for less than $1,500 per person--even in an off-season month such as April. Yet travelers willing to take a repositioning cruise on a moderately fancy cruise line in the spring or fall will find trips that are less expensive. Take the Norwegian Jewel, for instance. On Apr. 22, 2007, at the end of its winter season in the Caribbean, this ship departs Miami and heads east on a 15-day repositioning cruise to Athens. Norwegian was recently selling an interior cabin on the Jewel for $1,090 per person. One-way flights back to Miami recently started at $779 per person. So the total trip cost would be $3,738 for two. That sounds like a lot of money, and it is. But you may find this cruise to be a good value if you consider its cost per day. The cruise cost includes all lodging, meals, flights, and amenities for $249 a day per couple. That's a reasonable daily budget for an international vacation today. The most interesting repositioning cruises are in the fall, says Paul Motter, editor of Cruisemates.com. The reason: Fall is when some cruise ships return from a summer in Europe to head down the East Coast, while other ships return from a summer in Alaska to head down the West Coast. For example, Princess Cruises Crown Princess departs Oct. 20, 2007, from New York City and heads on an eight-day repositioning cruise to its winter circuit in the Caribbean, via St. Thomas, Antigua, and St. Kitts. If you live near New York City, you'll save on your airfare because you will only need to buy a one-way ticket. (When we recently looked at one-way flights from San Juan to New York City, the lowest fare we saw was $196 per person after taxes, flying on JetBlue.) "The cruise is a bargain at $499 per person, as well," Motter adds. To find repositioning cruise itineraries, go to Yahoo's travel page. (To see a list of crossings, go to the drop-down menu and click on the "transatlantic & repositioning cruises" option.) You'll also find many repositioning cruises by searching for "transatlantic" cruises at websites such as Expedia, Travelocity, and Kayak. Check the websites of individual cruise lines to see each one's full offerings of repositioning cruises, which may include Panama Canal passages. Here's a sampler of upcoming repositioning cruises. (Rates are based on double occupancy and include taxes and port charges.) Barbados to Lisbon, Apr. 8-22, 2007. Luxury cruise line Windstar's Wind Surf, which has 154 staterooms and is mainly propelled by seven giant sails, charts the Caribbean all winter and the Greek Islands all summer. A weeklong Caribbean voyage in March runs a hefty $1,662 per person, but you can enjoy this two-week repositioning cruise to the Greek Islands, which is twice as long, for a mere $61 more per person. (Total price: $1,723 per person.) It departs from Bridgetown, Barbados, for Lisbon. 800/258-7245; windstarcruises.com. Fort Lauderdale to Rome, Apr. 1-17, 2007. At the end of its winter season in the Caribbean, Holland America's Westerdam heads east on a 16-night repositioning cruise to the Mediterranean Sea. An interior cabin was recently selling for $1,843 per person, or $108 a day. One-way flights back to Fort Lauderdale recently started at $853 a person (multiple carriers). Contrast that with a shorter, seven-day Caribbean cruise departing Mar. 18, 2007, on the Westerdam: The rate for the same room was recently $942 a person, or $134 a day, which is 24 percent more than the repositioning cruise. 877/724-5425, hollandamerica.com. Fort Lauderdale to Amsterdam, Apr. 15-27, 2007. On its way from the Caribbean to a route off the shores of Scandinavia, Royal Caribbean's Jewel of the Seas stops in Cork, Ireland; Falmouth, England; Le Havre, France; and Brussels, Belgium. This 13-day tour with a family-sized, ocean-view cabin costs $1,332 per person. That's $102 a day, versus $129 a day for the same room on a nine-day route in the eastern Caribbean, which departs a few weeks earlier. 866/562-7625, royalcaribbean.com. More on Cruising Take a Cruise Without Getting On an Airplane Cruise Tips From Real Cruisers Classic Cruise Tips