Trip Coach: May 13, 2008

$16 Hat Panama hats actually originated in Ecuador, where they're handwoven from native Carludovica palmata straw. Fine hats sold at Homero Ortega Peñafiel e Hijos take a month to finish. Benalcázar N 2-52, between Bolivar and Sucre, 593/22-953-337, homeroortega.com. $10 Prints The museum, and former home, of Oswaldo Guayasamín, a Quito-born painter who depicted the country's indigenous Indians, is on a hill above the city. Calle José Bosmediano 543, 011-593/22-465-265. $8 CD Traditional folk music, played on wind instruments carved from Andean carrizo trees, can be found at Artesanías Sumagta. García Noreno 8-92 and Espejo, 011-593/22-953-025. $5 Napkin rings Artisans on the outskirts of Calderón use colored bread dough to sculpt tableware in the shapes of animals and dolls. El Danzante, Calle Carapungo 771 and Quitus, 011-593/22-825-892. $5 Pan flute Street musicians often perform on the rondador, a straight pan flute that produces two tones at a time. Find it at Centro Cultural Tianguez, a free-trade store that supports vendors nationwide. Plaza de San Francisco. $9 Necklaces Tagua seeds, which are found in the jungles of Ecuador, look like ivory when carved to make jewelry. Centro Cultural Tianguez, Plaza de San Francisco. $3 Bowl Indian mucahua pottery is traditionally used for drinking chicha, a fermented beverage made with maize or yucca. Centro Cultural Tianguez, Plaza de San Francisco. $20 Mask Each June 21, the residents of Quito wear wooden animal masks to celebrate the harvest festival of Corpus Christi. Centro Cultural Tianguez, Plaza de San Francisco. $7 Basket Generations of fisherman have been using these V-shaped baskets to hold their daily catch. Centro Cultural Tianguez, Plaza de San Francisco. $6 Belt The Indians of Ecuador's Sierra region believe that the rainbow is a link between heaven and earth, which is why most native clothing is woven with all the colors of the rainbow. Centro Cultural Tianguez, Plaza de San Francisco.

If you have an anecdote, please send it in to TrueStories@BudgetTravel.com! You might win a Celebrity cruise to Alaska, Hawaii, the Caribbean, or South America. Kids, meet your new teacher On a motorcycle trip through the Alps, my friend Bill and I stopped for lunch at a café in Ponte di Legno, a village in northern Italy. It was a local hangout with lively conversation, great food, and even a guitar-carrying nun. After we sat down, we noticed people filing outside, followed by a series of loud noises. "Are those firecrackers?" Bill asked. I looked out the window, and I couldn't believe my eyes. The nun, all of five feet tall, was cracking a bullwhip to the cheers of the crowd. With her feet planted, habit flying, and whip snapping, she ought to have been in a rodeo! David A. Swezey, Everett, Wash. Some kids dream of being Superman, others Lex Luthor I was in a phone booth in London when two boys began circling it with duct tape! I had to wait some time for a passerby to free me. Walking down the street, I saw the boys in an alley, and they smiled and waved. I couldn't help but smile back. Stephanie Fallon, West Chester, Pa. So the giraffe says, "Hey, baby, wanna neck?" The giraffes we encountered at a Kenyan reserve will eat from your hand, but if you put a nugget of food in your mouth, they'll take it from there, too. My grandson Andrew was eager to try it—and he got the best kiss of all. French, anyone? Aileen Saunders, College Place, Wash. You try doing it in high winds My friend and I were in Buenos Aires, and our guidebook recommended Tierra Santa, a religious theme park that resembles Jerusalem. "We regret to inform you that Christ will not be resurrected due to high winds," said a voice over the loudspeaker as we entered. "We will resume the resurrection as soon as possible." Twenty minutes later, the winds died, and sure enough, an eight-foot-tall Jesus emerged from a mountain. "Ave Maria" played, and everyone stopped to watch. Caroline Friesen, Seattle, Wash. Now that's a filthy story In Guanacaste, Costa Rica, my husband, Scott, and I hurried back from a hike to make it in time for our mud bath. The other guests in our group were already coated in mud and baking in the sun. When we entered the hut, two men motioned Scott to leave while they studiously painted me with mud from head to toe, leaving no skin uncovered and following close around my bikini. When I emerged from the hut, the people in our group asked how I got my mud on so perfectly; theirs was streaky and uneven. I said that was how the two men applied it. "What men?" they said. "We were all instructed to put it on ourselves!" Scott and I never did see those two guys again. Pam Anderson, Sussex, Wis. If you were a bidet, you'd probably be angry, too As we settled into our Florence hotel, we discovered an out-of-control bidet frothing all over. I found a maid, whose eyes got big when she saw the mess. She yelled down the hall, and another maid came in. They exchanged a few words, glanced at me, and burst into laughter. We'll never know what they said, but I suspect it was something like, "Was she trying to shampoo her hair in the bidet?" Maryka Biaggio, Portland, Ore. Sorry, but only her best friends get to call her that In Thailand, I came down with dengue fever and had to check in to a guesthouse for a few weeks. The innkeeper introduced herself as what I understood to be "So." She took wonderful care of me, and we became friends. When the time came for me to leave, she sat me down and explained that all this time I'd been calling her by the wrong name. Because I'd been using the wrong emphasis and tone, I'd been calling her "Three-Colored Pork." Samantha Kersten, Ham Lake, Minn. Everyone knows that a priest doesn't want a wife As a young cleric in Rome, I ventured to purchase a sweater. I'd been studying Italian and decided I was ready for a test run. Dressed in my religious habit, I went to a clothing store in Trastevere. I told the young shopkeeper that I was there to buy a sweater, but instead of saying maglia (sweater), I said moglie (wife). She smiled and asked me what kind of moglie I'd like. A moglie negra, I said—a black wife. By that time, a small group of women had gathered. She asked me to be more specific. I said I wanted a pesante negra moglie—a heavy black wife. The audience giggled. She then asked why I wanted a heavy black wife. "Riscaldarmi," I responded—to keep me warm. Everybody howled, and the shopkeeper told me in English that she might not have a heavy black wife for me, but she did happen to have a very nice sweater. Philip Traynor, Fresno, Calif. He's just bitter because he never evolved At a raja's palace in India, my friend Howard suggested I take a photo of him with one of the many monkeys that roam the grounds. He handed me his camera and inched over to a monkey sitting calmly on a wall. I snapped the first picture, of the two peacefully making eye contact—and by luck, I also captured the moment that followed. Fortunately for Howard, the monkey didn't pursue further. Dean Divis, Greenfield Center, N.Y.

New Prize: Celebrity cruise for two The best response we receive between May 14, 2008, and June 30, 2008, wins a Celebrity Cruises sailing for two good for up to 14 nights in Hawaii, Alaska, the Caribbean, or South America (excluding the Galápagos on Celebrity Xpedition). The prize includes accommodations in a veranda stateroom and is valid from Sept. 1, 2008, to Aug. 31, 2009. For more information on Celebrity Cruises: 800/852-7239, celebritycruises.com. How to enter E-mail us at TrueStories@BudgetTravel.com or mail us at True Stories, Budget Travel, 530 Seventh Ave., New York, NY 10018. For a complete rundown of the contest guidelines, please see BudgetTravel.com/truestories. This month's winner! This month's winner is Gene Jackson of Longmont, Colo. His prize is a five-night trip to New Zealand from ATS Tours. On our final day in Cancún, I headed to the beach to read while my wife went to the room. After an hour, I called the room, but there was no answer. I figured she got sidetracked. When another hour passed with no sign of her, I called again—still no answer. As soon as I walked into the room, I heard pounding on the bathroom door and saw a washcloth on the floor with "help" scrawled on it in mascara. "Get me out of here!" my wife was yelling. "I'm locked in!" She'd been trapped in the bathroom for two and a half hours. What a way to spend Valentine's Day! Mr. T couldn't pose because he was, you know, busy My husband and I were in a daze when we arrived in Chicago, having just completed a 96-day backpacking adventure around the world. As we shuffled past the Sears Tower on the way home, we spotted both Conan O'Brien and Mr. T on the street! Sensing our excitement, Conan agreed to pose with us for a photo and joked, "Let's pretend we're in the Himalayas." We couldn't believe he was the first person to welcome us home. Lilly LeClair, Princeton, N.J. Good schlep is hard to find We went to Venice in November, which happens to be flood season, so I was forced to buy a pair of boots that I could slosh around in. I was en route to Piazza San Marco when I encountered a stylish businesswoman. She kept gesturing toward the water, my feet, my backpack, and the next bridge. But she was speaking French, so I didn't understand a word, and she huffed off after a minute or two. Later, when I saw her getting a piggyback ride from a man, I realized what she had wanted. Susan Green, Lawrence, Mass. Hey, if the boob fits... I was thrilled to be having my first-ever massage, in a spa on the Riviera Maya. But when the therapist indicated that I was to lie face down, I knew I was in trouble. I'm well-endowed with fibrocystic breasts that are very tender, so there was no way I could do as she said. As she tried to reposition me, I squirmed, trying to find a way to get comfortable. Suddenly, I felt relief: One breast had entered the table's face opening, and the other was on the outside. The bewildered masseuse handed me a folded towel to rest my head on. I was never able to relax, though—I kept chuckling, wondering what the masseuse would tell her friends. Barbara Ridihalgh, Carmen, Idaho Italians and baseball: a strike waiting to happen My husband and two sons are huge baseball fans, so they made sure to bring along mitts and a ball for our camping trip in Italy. One day, as they were playing catch, they attracted the attention of local kids who had heard of baseball but had never actually seen it up close. Pretty soon they all got a game going, using the handle of a broken beach umbrella as a bat. For the rest of our stay, the kids would come to our cabin every day at 7 a.m., ready to play. Nancy Gill, Reno, Nev. Watch your toothbrush On a Mexican Riviera cruise, my husband and I were entertained by the creative towel critters that our cabin steward left for us every evening. One night, we decided to return the favor, constructing an "indisposed person" inside our bathroom. The steward's screams turned to laughter when he realized that we had upped the ante. Terri Stanley, Raleigh, N.C. Our first guess would've been a nun with a bullwhip My friend Holly and I were in Oaxaca the night before the Mexican presidential election. There had been political and social unrest all summer, so as we went to bed, we weren't sure what to expect the next day. I awoke to Holly tugging my arm and shouting, "It's the revolution! Wake up!" Noises that sounded like gunshots were coming from outside, and a crowd had gathered. We huddled on the floor, trying to figure out how to contact the U.S. embassy for help getting home. It was terrifying. Holly crawled to the door and peered out. Just then, a bunch of "gunshots" went off, and the crowd cheered. The gunshots were fireworks. The kid next door was celebrating a birthday. Jenny McCarthy, Carrboro, N.C. Economical, too! On a National Geographic tour of Yellow­stone National Park, my husband and I spent every night at a different lodge, enjoying after-dinner lectures about the fragile and ecologically important sites we'd seen. On the last day, we arrived at the lodge late after a long day of sightseeing. Jim showered first, but he complained that he could barely get any lather out of the soap. "This must be some environmentally correct soap," he said. I picked up the soap and figured out what was wrong: It was still shrink-wrapped. Barbara Kenny, Odenville, Ala. Perhaps veendam is the Dutch word for mortifying Our family took a Thanksgiving cruise in the Caribbean on Holland America's Veendam. One day, needing a break, my son decided to spend the day in the cabin. After I finished lunch, I headed down to the room for a nap. The cabin was dark and Tyler was fast asleep, so I headed back to the deck with a book. But my husband had other plans: He was in the mood for a little afternoon romance. He tiptoed into the cabin, navigating with a lighter. He removed his clothes and slipped under the covers. My son's shock at the touch of a hand on his shoulder sent them flying to opposite sides of the bed. It's one of those memories too precious to keep in the family! Christine Mitchell, Woodbine, Md. Now we know what the Swedish chef was cooking The cooks at our all-inclusive resort in the Dominican Republic set up cards naming the various dishes, and they'd often mix up the English words for ham, chicken, and other meats. I guess one night they gave up. Bud Bloom, Hilliard, Fla. Dennis the lusty menace During an OAT tour in Peru, I was dazzled by a shaman's knowledge of the rain forest. The group sat in a circle as he shared his plants and remedies and gave us tattoos with vegetable pigment. At the end of the presentation, he said that he had a surprise for us. He opened a door and released Dennis, the resident anteater. Dennis headed right for me. I was flattered (I've always loved animals) until Dennis forcefully mounted my leg. The shaman needed the help of two assistants to free me from Dennis's embrace. Mick Aldworth, Los Osos, Calif. He's no Dennis When I found out my company was sending me to China for four weeks, I was stressed. I had never been to the country before, and I'd be traveling alone. My husband, Chris, assured me it would work out, but my anxiety grew. After the grueling flight, I arrived at the hotel and found a surprise in my bag: Melvin, the Uglydoll that sits on my dresser. At first I felt silly traveling with the toy, but it made me laugh so much that I was glad to have Melvin along. When people asked whom I was traveling with, I'd say "Melvin." This worked well until a British couple asked if Melvin and I would join them for dinner. "You just missed him!" I said. "He's in the room, and he's already stuffed!" Emily Gerhardt, Kill Devil Hills, N.C. "Well, stick around, because you're about to see one very memorable moonrise" In Hawaii, my girlfriends and I hiked across lava rock to a secluded pond. We didn't encounter anyone until we came across a lone hiker, wearing nothing but a large backpack. He looked as surprised to see us as we were to see him. Trying to offset the awkwardness, he asked if I'd seen any whales. I said that we had, in fact, seen a whale, doing my best not to allow my eyes to drop below his waistline. Rachel Tavel, New York, N.Y. Prize Report For her story about dressing up as a group of Elvises in Las Vegas, Suzanne Fox Sevel of West Melbourne, Fla., won a six-night vacation rental from HomeAway.com. "Our villa in Martinique was magnifique!" reports Suzanne. "It was close to the island's best spots, but far enough from town to offer privacy. My family and I had a wonderful time."

What's your best travel tip? Send us your tips, and if we publish one, you'll get a one-year subscription (or a renewal) to Budget Travel. You can e-mail them to us at Tips@BudgetTravel.com. Best Tips Ever The cleverest tips we've ever run are in The Smart Traveler's Passport, a handy book available at Amazon.com and select bookstores. Send us a tip: If yours is one that we illustrate, we'll send you a free book (and a year's subscription to the magazine). 1. Art supply When we go to museums, we give each of our children a sketch pad and a pencil and have them draw something they like in each room. When they look back at their drawings, they discuss the sketches like they're art critics! Ashleigh Hodges, Hercules, Calif. 2. Sea through a different lens I knew I'd be snorkeling a lot in French Polynesia, so instead of buying several disposable underwater cameras, I bought a digital one on eBay for about $100. Unlike with disposable cameras, I know right away if I took a good or bad picture. I can delete the rejects, and I don't waste money developing crummy shots. Jennifer Robak, Hatfield, Pa. 3. Foot fault Don't get too comfy on train rides overseas. In Italy, a friend of mine was recently fined $78 for resting her feet on the seat located across from hers. Sara Trotta, Lockport, Ill. 4. Early-bird special When my wife and I fly with our young children, one of us preorders a special meal (kosher, gluten-free, etc.). These are almost always served at the beginning of the meal service, so one adult can eat while the other watches the children. When the rest of the meals are served, whoever has already eaten goes on kid duty. Scott Barber, Harpenden, U.K. 5. Place place mats Kid-oriented destinations, such as Legoland and SeaWorld, provide free paper maps of the parks. Instead of throwing them away, have them laminated to use as place mats or decorations in your child's room. Mike and Cindy Shields, Wellsville, Kans. 6. Gold star for Goldstar Go to goldstar.com for half-price tickets to shows and events in Los Angeles, San Francisco, San Diego, San Jose, and Orange County, Calif.; New York; Washington, D.C.; Chi­cago; and Boston. You buy your tickets online and pick them up at will call. I recently used the site to get half-price tickets to The Phantom of the Opera and Mamma Mia! in Las Vegas. Kevin Lum, San Francisco, Calif. 7. Shell shock When we were in the Dominican Republic, we walked many miles collecting seashells, but someone told us we might not be able to take them home. We looked into it and learned that some Caribbean countries limit the number and type of shells you can take from the islands. Offenders can be delayed at the airport and get slapped with a fine. Donna Mercier, Stratham, N.H. 8. Pharmaceutical sales I'm a flight attendant, and I often use just a carry-on bag when I fly. The TSA allows liquids in three-ounce bottles, but I could only find travel containers in two- or four-ounce sizes. On my mom's suggestion, I asked the local pharmacy if it had three-ounce liquid-prescription bottles I could buy. They sold me four for just $1. Julie Childers, Dublin, Ga. 9. Secret agents I hoped a travel agent in my area could dig up deals for my trip to Hawaii, but the rates she quoted me were higher than the ones I had found on my own. Then I happened upon info about Panda Travel, in Hawaii. I did a search for a car and hotel package on pandaonline.com and pulled up the best deal I'd seen yet. From now on, I'll look for travel agents where I'm planning to go. Brianna Yamashita, Kew Gardens, N.Y. 10. Attached at the hip I bought my sons fanny packs to use as toiletry bags. When they need to brush their teeth or comb their hair, they just grab their packs. This tip is especially handy when you're at a campground. Debra Kushnick, Marietta, Ga. 11. Ye shall receive On a recent trip to Tucson, I asked the woman at the visitors information center if she had any two-for-one coupons for area attractions like our visitors center in Seattle does. She did even better than that, producing two free tickets to the next day's spring-training baseball game at Tucson Electric Park. Charlie Tiebout, Seattle, Wash. 12. Big-box bargains If you're on vacation in southern California, check out a local Costco for discount tickets to theme parks such as Universal Studios, Legoland, and the San Diego Zoo. Michele Sinclair, Playa del Rey, Calif. 13. The winning shot When our kids were younger, we gave them disposable cameras and held photo contests on family trips. We'd come up with different "best photo" categories—of a meal, a seashell, a sunset, etc.—and hand out awards at the end of the vacation. Wendy VanHatten, Sergeant Bluff, Iowa 14. Pass go If you fly to Singapore on Singapore Airlines, hold on to your boarding pass. It gets you a day pass on the airline's trolley, which goes through all of the city's major tourist zones, for only $2.20 (the regular price is $9). James C. Wernicke, Sandia Park, N.M. 15. Upon reflection A small table-top mirror would have been wonderful on my first cruise last year. I'm used to sitting down when I put on makeup and style my hair, but the mirror in our cabin was so far from the chair that I had to stand in order to see myself. I just bought the perfect mirror for my next cruise, in November, at a dollar store. Joanie Martin, Fox Island, Wash. 16. Big savings Southwest Airlines encourages large passengers to book two adjacent seats. If you do this and the flight isn't sold out, you can request a refund after the trip by calling Southwest Customer Relations (214/792-4223) or sending the airline your flight information. Dayle Cohoon, Tracy, Calif. 17. Watching time fly When our grandkids asked how long the drive from New Orleans to Dallas would take, we told them four movies (which was eight hours). They loved that they could fit in so many movies on the trip, and they didn't keep asking us how much longer we had to go. Now we always give them driving times in DVDs. Cyndy Nordyke, Hurst, Tex. 18. It's in the tag Magellan's Retriever Luggage Tags have a message in eight languages telling baggage agents to check the itinerary in the tag so they can forward a lost bag to you while you're still traveling (magellans.com). Nona Tyler, Winter Park, Colo. 19. Take a compliment I pack a box of thank-you cards when I travel. If I get great service from the hotel or cruise staff, I leave a card. Most people in the service industry receive feedback only when it's negative, so compliments are refreshing. Jen Keivel, Beavercreek, Ohio 20. A sap story While I was at a restaurant in Pompeii, some sap dripped in my hair. I tried soap and water, but it didn't come out. Then I remembered I had Purell in my purse. I rubbed it on my hair, and it removed the sap! Mary Peters, Del Mar, Calif.